His Testimony
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Posted: April 23, 2022 His Testimony Shared By: Ashley Belcastro 2 Corinthians 5:17, New International Version “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” |
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I Am a New Creation in Christ - Part One
I used to be an atheist. The idea of God’s existence seemed completely bogus to me, especially with all the bad that goes on in this world. I would think to myself, “How could a loving, all-powerful God allow situations like child molestation, rape, sex trafficking, world hunger, concentration camps, and serial killings to happen?” I would say to others, “Even if there is a God, I wouldn’t worship him anyway because of all the horrible things he allows to happen on a daily basis.” I went as far as creating a special Pinterest board that was dedicated just to debunking the existence of God.
I was introduced to Christianity during my adolescent years. My father would take us to church on Sundays and youth night on Wednesdays. I never took it seriously. I would just go through the motions and try to believe in God because my dad said so. In my teen years, I had Christians befriend me and invite me to their church. I would participate and have fun, but I never truly believed.
After I became an adult, I went to church very rarely. I became a slave to many sins that I thought were not a big deal. It baffles my mind when I think about the person I used to be and the things I did that I thought were acceptable. I would get high on marijuana before and after work, drive under the influence, and drink alcohol and take opioids on my lunch break. At my first job as a deli clerk, I drank on the job. I would steal the alcohol off the shelf and hide it behind the deli counter. I stole groceries on a weekly basis. After all the horrible things I did, I still felt like I was a good, decent human being that contributed to society.
My whole life I felt like I was special, but in a weird way. I felt like I didn’t belong here and no one understood me. I thought maybe my life was all a dream and I would wake up soon. Something was missing. I could never quite put my finger on it. I would numb these feelings with chemical substances. I started to turn to new age stuff like healing crystals and burning sage. I started to become interested in witchcraft and even tried a spell that was supposed to make me lose weight. One day, when I really felt disconnected from reality, I got this idea in my head that I may be an alien. As silly as it sounds, I was beginning to believe this because of how uncomfortable I felt living on this earth. I thought it was the only explanation for this feeling. I was really searching for answers! I had no identity and no purpose. I was a lost, wandering soul. I eventually became emotionally numb and completely dead inside. I would think to myself, “Why am I here? What is all this for? What’s the point in even trying to live?” I would soon discover these answers.
On a Monday evening in August of 2020, I went to bed with horrible anxiety. I just couldn’t shake life on that particular day. I had been sound asleep, and then, about two in the morning, I was suddenly awoken with a jolt. All I could hear was the voice of God in my head. I don’t exactly remember what He said to me, but I knew it was Him without a doubt. I bet God had had enough of hearing the “alien talk” and thought it was time to wake me up!
Please come back next week to read part two of my testimony.
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